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@patio11

Patrick McKenzie

Writer-operator · Bingo Card Creator, Appointment Reminder, Stripe

SEO, copy, and charging more — the Kalzumeus school of software marketing

Do not sell software to programmers. Sell a job-to-be-done to a person with a budget. Search is unpaid demand. Copy is a force multiplier. Your prices are probably too low.

Don't call yourself a programmer when you are selling. They do not want a programmer. They want the bingo cards.
Model
Writer-CEO
Engine
SEO + essays
Stance
Price up

Products

  • Bingo Card CreatorA 'toy' that ranked and charged teachers real money
  • Appointment ReminderB2B, sold as missed-appointment insurance
  • Kalzumeus essaysThe long game: teaching as the channel

Across the five stages

How they actually operate.

01

Niche

A query with commercial intent and weak results. Teachers searching for bingo cards. Clinics tired of no-shows. The niche is the search plus the budget.

  1. 01Hunt keywords where the current results look like 2009.
  2. 02Ask who already spends money to patch this with a human.
  3. 03Prefer niches that are uncool — competition is asleep.
  4. 04Write the customer's sentence, not the engineer's.

02

Think

The product is allowed to be simple if the copy is specific. Scope to the outcome. Charge until it feels slightly uncomfortable.

  1. 01Remove technology words from the homepage draft.
  2. 02Raise prices on the existing customer base and watch.
  3. 03Sell to the economic buyer, not the enthusiast.
  4. 04Let support tickets write the roadmap.

03

Before

Essays and SEO pages that would be useful even if the product died. Trust is accumulated in public, in writing.

  1. 01Publish the thinking that makes the product obvious.
  2. 02Rank for the problem before you rank for the brand.
  3. 03Collect email as the home you actually own.
  4. 04A/B the sentence, not the illustration.

04

Launch

A page that converts search. A Show HN for the technical room. No theatrical countdown required.

  1. 01Launch when the promise is testable in one sitting.
  2. 02Use the skeptical rooms to harden the copy.
  3. 03Make paying easier than talking to you — then also be available to talk.
  4. 04Treat every support email as a public FAQ in waiting.

05

After

Compounding search, compounding essays, compounding price. A career is the ultimate funnel.

  1. 01Keep the canon updated so the channel does not rot.
  2. 02Raise prices as the outcome gets clearer.
  3. 03Let writing recruit customers, employees, and options you did not plan.
  4. 04Ignore markets that require you to sound like a brochure.

Tactics in the library